Is it possible to stop paying attention to the growing size of your derriere? Apparently? Yes. Yes it is. I'm proof of it. I saw myself in the mirror yesterday. No different than any other day... except? The angle. Martin Lawrence came out of my mouth with a loud 'n forceful "DAMN GINA!". I'm not sure what my brain was doing to trick my eyes into not noticing that I had turned into one of "those women". I'm darn-near on the verge of being a waddle woman. Not the pregnant waddle where you toddle around. No, I'm talking about the weeble wabble variety. Except with humans, you might fall down. Any step forward is tricky. With each successful plant of one's foot, it's considered a victory.
Okay maybe I'm not *that* bad. Yet. I'm way too close to shrug off the image that I saw in that mirror though. How did this happen? I mean, I know how it happened. The better question is WHY did I let it happen? Sure I could blame getting divorced and all that comes with it (which is A LOT and multi-layered and overlap'ish). The fact that I am older and it's harder to lose weight. My stupid budget restrictions that prevent me from joining workout facilities, buying home equipment or healthy food for myself. I could've used a "medical excuse that I don't really have" as a crutch of some sort.
I'm not going to though. None of that prevented me from taking a free walk around the block or blowing the dust off of an already-purchased DVD. My budget restrictions didn't mean I had to overdo on the affordable food I was buying to sustain me. Why is "Everything in Moderation" so hard? It's the easiest rule in the world. Yet? Not followed by many. Not followed by me.
Look - I'm not saying anything that millions haven't said before this post. However, I'm putting this out there publicly to help myself. The ole "if I say it out loud where all can hear/see" mode of thinking. Accountability.
I'm not hiding anymore, folks. It's not fair to me nor my kids. I've had enough.
1-31-13 --- Mark it.
Today: 25 minutes of Pilates, 30 minutes on Treadmill, Real breakfast and healthy lunch - check!